a list for friday—things I’d like to tell everyone

If we all stopped shopping there, Walmart would eventually go away.

Giving your kid an unusual first name does not make him special. That’s up to him. It just makes him a kid in suburbia with a weird name.

The sooner something’s dealt with, the easier it is.

You look thinner if your clothes aren’t skin-tight.

Most of the drama in your life is there because you allow it. (Or cause it.)

I didn’t come to the concert to hear you hum.

Not everything “happens for a reason.”

Sunscreen will postpone wrinkles. …


things I don’t understand, part 9

The appeal of Justin Bieber. I’m getting old.

Tongue piercing. Ditto.

Churches that refuse to let a woman “teach” but sing every hymn Fanny Crosby ever wrote.

Women who make big decisions about their hair or clothes based on their husbands’ preferences.

Buying expensive sunglasses (you don’t sit on them, scratch them, leave them on shelves at Target?)

Watching The Bachelorette.

Young earth creationism.

Those guys standing on corners twirling signs advertising strip mall stores. Have you EVER made the decision to eat somewhere because they paid a high schooler to hold a sign on the corner?

Why Walmart still employs greeters. I can’t imagine there is …