a list for friday: my life in texts, part 3

baby_texting_omg_I_just_got_born by mick stevensI might be late. I was in a parade that went long.

We’ll all go run an errand. Pants optional.

Hi from the Cleveland airport. It’s as exciting as you’d imagine.

Biggest priority of the day: BUY CLARITIN.

I’m reciting imprecatory psalms.

Know what’s worse than board games? Board games by candlelight with no heat.

Slept in and missed the last session. I’m a heathen—but a well-rested one.

We’re having a family Wii party, so if you show up you could be drafted.

Smother me with a pillow instead of sending me to a nursing home.

I like carrot cake more than breathing.

Call if you want talked back from the ledge.

Leaving the synagogue.

Let me just say it’s even more fun when your oven’s in the living room.

I’m cleaning in heels. Breaking them in.

Maybe we could stay up until u get home HINT HINT

Miles is sitting near me on the bus talking to a girl!

One of our board members looks like Hitler. Or Charlie Chaplin.

What would she like for her birthday? We’re thinking a pet hedgehog named Huckleberry.

Is the cute guy in your fall pics worth a discussion?

The light up deer won’t look tacky in the front yard. It sounds tacky but it won’t.

The fat lady hasn’t sung yet but she is at the microphone.

Click here for parts 1 and 2.

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