a list for friday–25 things I can promise you I will never do

Wear my cell phone in a belt holster.

Watch a soap opera.

Stop eating carbs.

Appear in a local TV commercial.

Listen to Joel Osteen without rolling my eyes.

Revision: Listen to Joel Osteen.

Catch up on my email.

Run for office.

Get tired of talking to four-year-olds.

Dress up as a clown.

Eat blood sausage.


Voluntarily watch NASCAR.

Own a rat.

Say I love anything “to death.”



Date any man who wears a kilt. 

Shave my head.

Write “lol” after every any sentence on Facebook.

My child’s science fair project.

Host the Academy Awards.

Watch a slasher movie.

Knowingly answer a rhetorical question.

Cut anyone’s hair.

Live in Minnesota.



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